Summer's Here

...and the living is, well, easier at the moment, at least on the home front. The Murphinator is recently on the guilt trip rampage. I got three emails this weekend laying blame on me for abandoning her and "cutting [her] off". Interesting, as I can count on one hand the number of emails and phone calls I've gotten from her in the last five months (including this weekend), and two of those were just "are you coming to the birthday party". I gave up emailing her to ask if she wanted to get the kids together, go to the movies or go out to lunch because I never got a response. Whenever I called I got the answering machine and no response later-- so I gave that up too. Figured she didn't want to talk to me. Apparently in her world that means "call me more! offer to do more things with me!" and I was just too dumb to get that. I called her guilt trip on all points and made it pretty clear that I wasn't the one doing the cutting off, and that I wasn't going to put up with any more rude behavior (like at the Nephew's birthday party last month). I have a feeling that that will be the end of things, though I am not terribly torn up about that.
Hmmm...this divorce business doesn't make much sense to me. She has been knashing teeth and moaning that she needs to get out of this marriage for over 2 years, and that she doesn't want him in the house, yet when he left she announced he had abandoned her and the kids. Abandonment is pretty lucrative apparently: he has continued to pay ALL her bills PLUS give her $2500 a month spending money since he moved out. She's been saying for the same two years that she needs to get a job to have some security, and actually had several opportunities (interviews and all) to get jobs and refused to take any of them. The last one was because if she continued to be unemployed she "could screw him for more money in the divorce" (announced that to me at lunch in January). And yet she continues to whine that she has no security and that she has no job. She is now whining that no one invites her to any of the family occasions -- where her soon-to-be-ex-husband will be, the one person she has announced she wants nothing to do with socially anymore. Hmmm -- how do we invite her to come to an event where he will also be because he is part of this family??? Does she want an invitation just so she can say "Drop dead, I would never come to anything with him there."??? And since we have these functions on the weekends when we are all off work and he has the kids anyway, why would we invite her to come intrude on his time with the kids? She is rude to me, rude to FIL, and awful to her nearly-ex-husband. There is nothing amicable about this and yet she apparently wants the rest of us to act like it's perfectly friendly... and let her shit all over us. I know, it's divorce, she has a lot to be angry about ... but at least recognize that. Put on the goddamn big girl panties, do what it takes to secure your kids' future, and get the fuck ON with your life. I hope she finds someone soon who meets her needs as a friend or whatever else, as I am not that person.